


By any other prompt...

by holdingbreaths



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
Genre: Anal Sex, Blind Date, Canon Compliant, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Funny, Hate to Love, Humor, M/M, Oral Sex, Pretend couple, Secret Relationship, Sex, Sexual innuendos, Tumblr Prompts, featuring: me trying to escape my obligations by entering a madman's quest, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-08-29 14:10:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8492764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdingbreaths/pseuds/holdingbreaths
Summary: (this pairing would smell just as gay).After stumbling across a ship prompt sheet on Tumblr, I try to recreate every possible situation - doesn't matter how unlikely - with this pairing from Hell. Let's see how many I can fill before Breath of the Wild comes out!Chapter 1. Canon verse - Friends to LoversChapter 2. Canon verse - Hate to loveChapter 3. Canon verse - Blind DateChapter 4. Canon verse - Secret RelationshipChapter 5. Canon verse - Pretend Couple:Link's debts in the Bazaar are concerning; sharing a room with Fledge is both annoying and traumatizing; and Peatrice still believes they are engaged - even though Link couldn't be gayer.Life as a former Hero is not as easy as one would think. Ghirahim might be the solution to at least one of those problems.





	1. Friends to Lovers - Canon Verse

**Author's Note:**

> Helloooooooo 'lil demons!
> 
> So, I was on tumblr, like you do when you're making two doctorate's project, and I stumbled over this lovely writing sheet:
> 
> https://67.media.tumblr.com/a2e5c2dacab1d5a0fdd631366bfcca94/tumblr_ncw4j42DUG1tmhxhyo1_500.png
> 
> Fun, right?
> 
> So I said to meself: "Meself, why don't we, instead of choosing one setting and one trope, why don't we try to write ALL OF THEM, MESELF?"
> 
> Because, surely, that's what you do when writing two doctorate projects.
> 
> Of course, when you realize we have 20 settings and 20 prompts, we have a, wait, let's do the math: fuckton of mini fics to be written. So I decided, you know what, let's just stick to canon-verse by now, because I'm always a slut to canon-verse fics.
> 
> Also, I tried to do small ficlets, like, three, four paragraphs? It's not happening. It's just not happening. Fuck.
> 
> Anyway, I'll put the prompt of every chapter on the summary so you can skip to the ones that actually interest you. I'll try to post one each week (I'm already at prompt five). Let's see how far I can get!
> 
> I LOVE comments, and I do try to make this things funny, even though I don't always manage. Hope you enjoy at least some of it!

“Link, tell me again about how we became friends.”

Ugh… fuck. That was a hard question.

“Why is that, now?”

“No reason. I just wish to hear your version of the story.”

“Well, at first, we hated each other.”

“Did we now?”

“Oh, you don’t think we did?”

Link has to turn and stare at Ghirahim. The demon was lying on the green grass just outside the statue of the Goddess, right by the bushes that always had butterflies flying around. That resulted in butterflies flying around his head, since the attention whore had actually put flowers in his silver blond hair. He _should_ look stupid, Link considered.

“Well, Skychild, I’m not sure we actually hated each other. Two soldiers on opposite sides of a war hate each other, truly, or merely serve their higher causes?”

“Man, no offense, but fuck off. You hated my guts. You unleashed a fucking sentient, angry, huge fire ball at me just for shits and giggles.”

“Oh, I had forgotten all about that, that was fun! You were, indeed, truly annoying those days.” Ghirahim said with a chuckle. “Okay, so maybe I hated you a little. Please keep going with your narrative.”

“What, like a bedtime story?” Link asked as he saw Ghirahim close his eyes. “Want me to sing you a lullaby?”

“Fuck no, you have terrible singing voice.” Ghirahim came closer to Link, resting his head on his thigh. “C’mon, I’m not sleeping, I just have a headache. Let me rest my eyes for a bit, I’m listening.”

“Finicky asshole. Okay, hum, so we hated each other, then we had the whole fighting thing-y and you had the whole dying thing-y.”

“And you got profoundly heartbroken, I’m sure.” Ghirahim muttered.

“Not really, gotta say. Hey, no pinching, or else I’m gonna roll you out of my lap! No, but really, I wasn’t… I dunno, man, it was weird. I kinda of knew we were gonna fight in the end, and I kinda of hoped I would win, but I never realized that it meant you’d die. So those were weird days, I kept thinking, what the hell, is he really dead? And then you got better.”

“Bokoblin’s balls, _how many times_ …” Ghirahim took deep breaths. Eyes still closed, he started again. “How many fucking times will I have to fucking explain to you that I wasn’t dead, that I was just trapped in another…”

“There, there, sshh, no need to get mad.” Link tangled his fingers lightly in Ghirahim’s soft hair, petting him as he would a Remlin. “No one cares about your bullshit technicalities. You died, you came back, fucking miracle if you ask me.”

“Were you all tingling inside when you saw me again?”

“Yeah, I was.” Ghirahim opened his eyes at that. “Tingling so bad I was shitting myself in fear, actually.” Ghirahim closed his eyes again. “I thought, fuck, if he’s back, what else is coming out of the hell hole he crawled out of?”

“Always the optimistic.”

“Mind you, I was already fucking tired of fighting. But then Zelda took over, and you guys had your heart to heart for five straight days and I actually thought you would elope by the end of the week.”

“Oh, right, because I hadn’t give you enough flamboyant cocksucker vibes by that time.”

“Well, you were the first man I knew with those… hm… preferences, so you have to excuse my confusion.”

“Impa.”

“I said _man_.”

“Fledge.”

“Are you counting Fledge as a man now? You weren’t last week.”

“You’re absolutely right, that design mistake doesn’t deserve the title. Uncle Bats.”

“Again, not human.”

“Beedle.”

“Is Beedle gay?” Link asked a little louder than he intended.

“Is Beedle _straight_?”

“Is Beedle anything, really?” Link pondered, a little more sober.

“Good point. Yourself.”

“… Still up for debate.”

Ghirahim kept his eyes closed, and Link decided not to look, but he could sense the demon rolling his eyes.

“Keep going, Skychild.”

“So, after those five days, you somehow earned Zelda’s forgiveness. And she told me straight up I was not to fuck with you.”

“ _She did not!_ ” his tone was horrified.

“I meant not to mess with you.”

“Oooooooh, in that case, carry on.”

“Anyway, you creep… I ignored your existence for almost a year, and I thought that would be that.”

“You really did?”

“Yeah. I thought, yeah, okay, now Zelda has forgiven him and we have our own personal Demon Lord running around terrifying kids, but he’s not doing any harm, so I’ll let him be, and he’ll let me be, and we’ll coexist without hurting each other any longer. Because I thought that was the other option. I would either let you keep your privacy and your quiet, or I would come closer and the old wounds would reopen and we would clash again.”

“Entangled in a red thread of fate.” Ghirahim whispered, his voice coming from far in the past.

“That we were. I kept Zelda words in mind, you know? Not to mess with you. Forgive. I thought the only way to accomplish that was to also forget.”

“Could you? Forget me, that is?”

That took a long time to answer. “I… I tried. That first year, you back. I tried to forget you were living with us. You made it easy, you wouldn’t talk to me, you wouldn’t raise your eyes.”

“I was afraid…”

“Afraid of what, Ghirahim?”

The Demon seemed to come to his senses. He closed his eyes again. “Never mind that. I can tell you some other day if you so wish, today I’m not the one telling the story. Keep going.”

“So, yes, I tried, but I also failed. After a while I kept trying to catch glimpses of you. I would seek you out in the Goddess tributes, and I would try to ask around for you if I haven’t seen you all day. Pipit… Pipit was a right fucker, about that time. Any time he saw me, he said ‘Hey, Link, how’s it going? Ghirahim is out by the lake’ or ‘Ghirahim is talking with the Headmaster’. I think I asked him, I don’t know, twice about you? But he could always see I was searching you. Fucking bully.”

“He is an annoyingly observant little bird, isn’t he?”

“But he kept me sane; otherwise I would probably keep flying my goddamn Beetle around you all hours of the day.”

“Kinky.”

“No, Ghirahim, batshit crazy, that’s what you mean. Then one day you flipped your shit and attacked me for no fucking reason.”

“I _confronted_ you, because I felt you were being _unfair_ and a _total asshole_ …”

“Yadda yadda yadda, I thought I was the one telling the story? I was minding my own business, I hadn’t creeped out on you that much that day, keeping my distance and my mad spying skills, when you threw me against a fucking wall and told me I had to stop watching you otherwise you would set my hair on fire. So I asked you out for a beer.”

Ghirahim was laughing freely at that. “Weirdest reaction ever! I couldn’t even answer for five minutes straight, kept looking at you like a fish. Would you care to explain what prompted you to do that?”

“Well… I thought you were right. I didn’t have any right to creep on you, and I was being an asshole. So I thought you deserved some compensation, but I wasn’t about to apologize, which I’m sure was what you wanted. So I thought, hey, he’s not going to get his sorry, but at least he’s going to come out of this mess feeling happier, and less thirsty. Good deal, in my opinion.”

“Yes, well, it had been an awfully hot day.”

“So we went, and we drank, and… I don’t think we got drunk that day, didn’t we? No, we didn’t. We just… talked. And the next time I saw you, you actually answered my ‘good morning’, and we had drinks the week after that because it was Groose’s birthday party and he was already in good terms with you by that point…”

“Good terms? We were bestsies.” Link pulled at Ghirahim’s hair at that, discovering, on that moment, that he kept caressing the demon all that time. He didn’t pull his fingers away, though.

“Yeah, right. You two were _civil_ , which is more than can be said about the two of us, because I remember we had a huge argument that night about faith and responsibility and probably Demise.”

“Probably. All our fights those days were about Demise.”

“Yeah, we yelled… a lot. But we met at Eldin two weeks after that ‘cause we both needed Eldin rollers, and it was nice until…”

“We yelled again?”

“Yeah. ‘Bout Demise. And it kept like that until, I don’t know, man, until we ran out of things to yell at each other? I don’t think there’s a single argument, hurtful or not, that we haven’t used in a fight about Demise. I don’t know if you felt the same. I just felt tired arguing the same shit over and over and over. So one day we went out and we ate pumpkin soup and neither of us yelled. So I guess that was the day I think we became friends for real.”

“Over a year ago.”

“Yeah, over a year ago. And you were funny, and I liked have you around. Oh, and we started sparring together, remember? Before we got good, we were already sparring.”

“I think the sparring did wonders to the ‘get good’ process.”

Link had to laugh at that. “No one wanted to train with us, so we only had each other. I was so slow that first time, you almost gutted me.”

“I would never!”

“Yeah, sure, lie to me, pretty thing.” Link sighed. “And then we got to see and talk to each other more, and we got close, and sometimes we worked together on the Surface.”

He was omitting a few parts, true be told. Just snippets here and there. Just… just the way Ghirahim sometimes held his hand when he was trying to stop him from running too fast. Or the way they used to lie down, side by side, to sleep when they camped together – even when the nights were warm and there was no need for closeness. The way Ghirahim would sometimes demand massages, or the way Link would sometimes hug him from behind, getting on his tiptoes just to put his head on Ghirahim shoulder. The lingering touches and the warm looks. Things Link could neither explain nor pinpoint the beginning. True is, he couldn’t include all those little things in his narrative even if he wanted, because those moments were too fragile to put in words.

“And then we were talking daily and we used to go hunting at least once a week, and one night I had a panic attack and went crying to Zelda.”

“You… what?”

“Had a panic attack. Full one, by the way. Before you ask, yeah, because of you. I… Hylia Almighty, Ghirahim, I cried like a baby. I couldn’t stop myself. I kept telling Zelda I couldn’t do that to her, because you tried to kill her, because you deserved forgiveness but not fondness, because I wasn’t able to deny being close to you anymore, because I didn’t want to stop being your friend but I couldn’t continue it either. I thought I was betraying her, and my people, by choosing you. She waited, she stood with me all night, and when I was calmer, she finally said: ‘There’s no side to pick, silly’. She called me silly, I distinctly remember that. ‘It’s alright to be his friend. You’re not doing anything wrong.’. Fuck, I cried harder after she said that. She kept muttering it against my hair, and I cried fucking harder. I slept on her bed all day, didn’t come out of her room for two days.”

“I have no recollection at all of this episode.”

“Good thing you don’t, I thought I would never tell you. Anyway. I came out of her room, took a shower, dressed myself, went to your house and asked if you wanted to battle the last Bokoblins in Lanayru’s Sand Sea, see if we could find ourselves some treasure. You stared at me for a whole minute before you said yes. I thought you were seeing the crazy in my eyes or something.”

“It was six in the morning, Link. I wasn’t even seeing _you_ , let alone the crazy. I was fucking asleep. Dead man walking.”

“So that’s the story of how we became friends.” Link sighed, finished, his fingers still entangled in Ghirahim’s hair.

“Link.”

“Yes?”

“And how about the story of how we became more?”

Link’s heart almost beat out of his chest. He was sure Ghirahim could hear it drumming fast.

“I… what do you mean?”

“I mean-” Ghirahim sat up, looking him in the eyes. “I mean we can stay exactly like we are. Friends, good friends, best friends. Companions in joy and in pain, the pain none of the others would ever understand, the joy none of the others deserve as much as we do. We can remain exactly like this, and I won’t ever talk about it again, if that is your wish. But I also mean that there’s something else, something boiling under our companionship for a long time, and I can’t pretend I don’t see it any longer. I’m not a very patient demon, Link. You have to know that, by now. I’m also not very good at wanting and not having.”

“That I know.”

“That you know.” Ghirahim confirmed. “You want someone to play nice, go ask Orielle if she’s interested. I’m a fucking demon. I’ll either push or I’ll let go once and for all. I won’t keep dancing around this goddamn elephant.”

Link had no idea how to answer it. He opened and closed his mouth, but no sound came out. Finally, Ghirahim rolled his eyes, grabbed his face between his fingers, and pulled him in.

With their mouths only an inch apart, Ghirahim asked again:

“Last chance, Hero. You want in or you want out? Your choice to make.”

Link closed his eyes. This one would be much, much harder to explain.


	2. Hate to Love - Canon Verse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon verse - Hate to love
> 
> (Not exactly love, per se, but let's just say hate to lust and be over with it?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, second prompt on our little shipping writing sheet. I actually love this one - just the first sentence made me really proud. Tell me whatchu think: also, if you're dying to see a prompt more than others, just use the sheet (https://67.media.tumblr.com/a2e5c2dacab1d5a0fdd631366bfcca94/tumblr_ncw4j42DUG1tmhxhyo1_500.png) and tell me what do you want, and I'll write it! Please, let me hear your voices!

“Why won’t you fucking die?”

“I’ll die the moment you are finally defeated, you miserable, weak, despicable worm!”

“Well, _I’ll_ be defeated the moment you stop being a bitch ass psycho-bitch – that means never!”

“YOU SAID BITCH TWICE!”

“BECAUSE YOU’RE TWICE THE BITCH, BITCH!”

The sound of swords clashing filled the room for a long time after that. Link and Ghirahim danced fast around each other, trying to get a breach on the other’s defense, but managing only to tire themselves.

Link could not believe that asshole was _still_ alive. Demise had been defeated, the Surface had been saved, the unholy sword had been destroyed. That meant Ghirahim should be dead, right? Wrong, because the asshole was fucking persistent. Hylia almighty, Link just wanted to see him _gone_.

Link was a better swordsman than Ghirahim, that much was clear. Only, without the Master Sword – and Fi – by his side, and with Ghirahim cheating as he was, the thing was impossible to finish. The demon kept disappearing, using magic, throwing knives: worst of all, he didn’t admit he was cheating, he said he had the right to use magic, that Link was the weaker one for not having it. Fucking bastard.

“You are a fucking bastard!” Link said aloud, because he could.

“You already used that one, Hero.”

“Really, when?” Link had to stop to take a breath, drinking the last sip of red potion he carried.

“Just outside Lanayru Desert, two months ago.” Ghirahim was patiently waiting him, twisting a knife between his fingers.

And that was the thing: after Link figured Ghirahim was alive, they kept meeting and clashing. The first months, Link would actively search for him on the Surface, trying to end the demon for the last time. Lately, though, Link knew they were so equally matched none of them could win, and Ghirahim wasn’t exactly trying to raise any demon kings lately, so Link kind of went on with his life and adventures. Only, guess what: they still ran into each other constantly, meeting at the most bizarre places, even though both wanted to avoid the other. As it was, Link was about to start believing the whole “thread of fate” bullshit.

“No, two months ago we were at that weird ass place behind the Antique Cistern.”

“Ancient, you idiot, the Cistern is Ancient.”

“Whatever, I fucking hate that place, all those undead Bokoblins lurking around.”

“Ugh, yes, hate them as well.” Ghirahim agreed, cleaning his booths with a rag conjured from thin air. “And those fucking fish-men-things that float around, what’s with that?”

“I can never tell which ones are sentient and which ones are just fishes, last week I said sorry for tripping over a fucking carp.” At Ghirahim’s chuckle, Link unsheathed his sword again. “C’mon, demon, let’s get going, I still have to fly all the way to Skyloft today.”

“Already?” Ghirahim asked, two conjured swords on his hands.

“What, you tired? Want me to fetch you some stool to rest your old bones?” Link danced around the demon, shield raised and sword ready.

“ _I_ am not the one who keeps needing stamina potions, now am I?”

“I have to tell you, Ghirahim, you” and Link pointed with his sword, a wicked smile on his face. “are the only one who _ever_ complains about my lack of stamina. Not a single unhappy customer so far.”

And, with that, Link attacked.

They fought for a while, and Link managed to hit a blow or two, but obviously Ghirahim’s skin was impenetrable, and the sword only met hard metal – as Link knew it would. Ghirahim, for his part, wasn’t trying too hard to hurt Link, and at a given moment he chose to slap the Hero instead of cutting him: it sting and humiliated like hell, but it was better than the scar that would probably cross his face if the demon had gone for the knife.

All in all, it was pretty much a standard weekly fight for them, if Link was being quite honest. More like a sparring session than anything else.

Eventually, when Link was about to call it, Ghirahim gave him an opening so blatant that his body took over on automatic: Link threw himself at the demon, rolling them around and pinning him firmly to the ground. With his hands closed around wrist bones, both his legs containing Ghirahim’s lower body, Link smiled, useless sword forgotten.

“Gotcha!”

“Ye-yeah.” Ghirahim had trouble breathing, and closed his eyes for a second. “Now that you finally have the upper hand, what are you going to do about it, Hero?”

Link stared at Ghirahim’s closed eyes, long lashes resting against a pale cheek, silk white hair falling over his forehead. He… well, he hadn’t thought about it, had he? Hadn’t thought about what he was going to do when he finally defeated the demon. It had been so long since there was the smallest chance of that actually happening that he didn’t even consider it anymore. But the answer was right there, wasn’t it? It was obvious. Ghirahim opened his eyes.

“I’m going to destroy you.” Link answered, trying to pretend his words didn’t sound unsure.

“Oh, is _that_ the plan?” Ghirahim looked up at him with pleased eyes, and Link knew right then and there that he was fucked. “I thought you were going to show me where you’re hiding all that stamina.”

Ghirahim moved his body, not away from Link, but towards him. Link rolled his eyes.

“Ghirahim, whatchu on about, man?”

“Well, Link, giving our positions, I thought we may find a way of ending this meeting without the use violence?”

“Oh, you think you can seduce me?”

“Oh, you think I can’t?”

Link looked down at Ghirahim’s lipstick-white lips: he knew he could. Seduce him, that is. A hint of tongue licked Ghirahim’s lips. Link was already halfway to hard.

“Where do you get this fucked up ideas, demon?”

“I get it from the fact you have been either staring at my cock or staring at my ass every time we meet for the last six months. You either want me or you enjoy white pants way too much.” Ghirahim smiled, then, a pretty smile that made him look younger. “C’mon, Hero, are you sure you wish to keep fighting?”

Link didn’t wish to keep fighting. He wished to keep rubbing, that is, rubbing his hard cock against Ghirahim’s warm thighs. Though decision.

“You’re an asshole.”

“Oh, but I can be a sweetheart as well.” Ghirahim winked, his voice dripping with honey. “Let me go and I’ll show you what else my touches are good for, besides beating your ass black and blue.”

Link tightened the grip on the demon’s hands.

“You’re only saying that because I’ve overpowered you.”

Ghirahim’s expression suddenly changed, and the demon was rolling his eyes in pure exasperation.

“Look here, fucker, I’m a fucking demon. I can teleport: if I wanted out from under you, I would be fucking out from fucking under you, you fucktard. Get with the program.”

Oh. Oh.

“So… why are you…”

“I swear to Hylia, Link, if you ask me why I haven’t teleported yet I _will_ find a way of killing you, and it _will_ be painful.”

That left Link hovering under a demon that wasn’t really as overpowered as he ought to be, sword left forgotten ages ago on the other side of the room, and his cock throbbing insistently between his legs, not nearly as soft as it should.

Because there wasn’t really an honorable out of this situation, and because his mouth was right there, he kissed Ghirahim: it’s not like he was about to kill the asshole anytime soon, so he might as well find other ways of punishing him.

Fucking bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I - just as any other author - live for comments. Remember we are a smol fandom, so every 'hi there, i'm reading this' will warm my heart. Hope you all have a lovely week!


	3. Blind Date - Canon Verse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon Verse - Blind Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's almost four am here in Rio so, I guess it's sunday? Hope ya'll have a great week! <3

The night air was sweet and pleasant, and Link was very thankful for Pipit’s lift into the night sky – the young man had just managed to get the liberation to fly at night, and his friends and girlfriend were very much enjoying it. Tonight, though, Pipit was on a mission given by the Goddess herself: get Link on his date on time.

First of: you can’t believe the things Zelda tell you about Link. She’ll tell you all kinds of shitty lies; she’ll tell you Link is lonely and miserable and getting grumpier by the second; she’ll tell you he haven’t smiled in ages and that all that frowning is going to get him wrinkles too soon; she’ll tell you he can’t get a date in a million years and that he needs to fuck or get fucked or else she’ll unleash Demise on the Surface herself.

Those are the kind of lies the Goddess Hylia have been spreading around Skyloft. Link was kind of tired of having an all seeing, all knowing divinity as his best friend.

Okay, so maybe he felt a bit isolated and anxious since he’d come back from his explorations on the Surface. He had friends, good friends, and he even felt happy – but thing was, most people couldn’t understand what had happened, couldn’t grasp the stakes that were at play during those months Link fulfilled his destiny as the Hero. Groose, the late Impa and Zelda were, maybe, the only ones that could recognize those days for what they truly were – and, of course, Fi that, just as Impa, was now gone. Link was grateful he had at least two good friends that could acknowledge the experiences he lived, even though their places had been significantly different: he could talk with them, and together they formed a small protection web for each other.

But he couldn’t _date_ them, because, for one, he needed them as friends; for two, he couldn’t imagine himself touching those two sexually for the life in him. Even the prospect made him shiver.

So he accepted his fate. He would spend his days getting better at the Academy, training his aim with Fledge, training his combative hand skills with Karane, reading with Master Gaepora, flying rounds with Orielle, getting on weird-ass political discussions with Cawlin, learning new medicines with Owlan. And, of course, watching the little Kukiel every free moment, since Jakamar and Wryna were such fuck ups as parents. Oh, and picking up childish fights with Ghirahim, since the asshole came back from the dead and became a part of their little community. And learning how to make pumpkin soup from Henya. And… okay. So maybe Link spent his days filling them with useless activities, but no, he wasn’t lonely or isolated, see?

He just felt this way.

Zelda, though. Zelda was a stubborn little thing, wasn’t she? “This one”, she’d said. “This one will be the one. This one will get it, Link, get you. This one will be able to listen to the horror and the bad parts and the good parts and they won’t be scared or sad or confused. They’ll _get it_ , Link, I promise you.” She flipped her hair then, all cockiness. “Don’t you fucking trust your Goddess, you atheistic imp?”

Link hated when Zelda used the Goddess card, because mostly he wanted to accuse her of being blasphemous but couldn’t very well do it.

So that’s why Link found himself in the back of Pipit’s bird, flying into the soft night towards the Lumpy Pumpkin, a lumpy something on the back of his own throat. What if this person hated him? What if _he_ hated this person? Zelda can feed whatever bullshit she wants to her blind followers, but Link knows she can’t predict the future, she can’t even choose a good enough haircut on most days! Oh, no. What if this person was fucking Peatrice? FUCK!

The Lumpy was conveniently empty. Anyone would do anything these days for the Hero, even if most of them couldn’t quite understand what Link had saved them from. Kina had a table set upstairs, with a warm cauldron of soup just in reach, so she wouldn’t have to stay to serve them.

The person Link would be dining with today… wasn’t there yet.

Pipit gave him a wave and off he went, with a promise of coming back to get him in four hours. Link said goodbye to the one person that could save him in case this meeting was a horrible, terrible, not good idea from dear old Zelda.

He was now alone, nervous, sitting on a table, waiting for a total stranger to come and probable have the most awkward four hours of his life. He would rather face Demise again.

Well, maybe not Demise, Link thought, hand travelling instinctively to the scar over his neck. Maybe Tentalus. Yeah. That guy was easy.

Fifteen minutes passed and no sign of the night’s special guest. Twenty. When half an hour came and went, Link could finally breath easily: this person wasn’t coming, thank Hylia (probably not), and Link could eat a lonely, but tasty, meal in peace. Perfect.

He had a mouthful of soup when he heard a loud snap sound just on his back. He turned to try and see what had happened (if that fucking chandelier was about to go down again, he was flying the scene, no way in hell he was going to pay for that fucking thing again), but the place looked empty and quiet. As Link turned around again, he jumped and almost fell from his chair: Ghirahim was sitting in front of him, on the other side of the table.

“…the fuck, you asshole, you scared me!” Link still had his hand on his chest.

Ghirahim had the audacity to laugh, like the maniac he was.

“I did, didn’t I?” he dried a tear under his eye, still trying to catch his breath. “Oh, Hylia, that was funny.”

“No, it wasn’t!” Link yelled. “I thought the fucking chandelier was going down again.”

“…again?”

“Yeah, that goddamn thing is unstable like hell, I was accused once of breaking it, had to slave myself to pay for it.”

“Why were you accused of it? I thought the owner of this hole loved you.” Ghirahim said, helping himself with the soup without a single second thought.

“You call it a hole but you love the soup, don’t deny it. And… I might have been accused because… I might have dropped it? On purpose?”

Ghirahim was laughing again.

“I knew you had been a fucking brat when you were a child, how long ago was this?”

“…Last year?”

Ghirahim couldn’t breathe, he was laughing so hard. Link couldn’t help but smile as well, the demon was getting red in his usually pale face.

“…why… Hylia Almighty…Why would you drop the fucking chandelier? You were already the Hero a year ago!”

“No, no, shut up, I wasn’t, not yet!” Link was gesticulating to try and make his point. “Listen, there was piece of heart over the chandelier, I thought I could, ya know, shake the thing a bit and drop _just_ the piece of heart, I wasn’t aware the whole thing would come down, what was I supposed to do, leave a piece of heart hanging there?”

“Oh, no, the rightful thing to do was, of course, break and steal.” Ghirahim managed to keep a straight face, until Link threw a napkin at his face. “Hey, I’m not judging! I’ve done some shitty things for pieces of heart as well. Do you remember those Mogma shit-heads from Eldin?”

“Hey, don’t call them shit-heads!” Link served them both wine, trying and falling to get offended for his friends. “They are… nice.”

“They _might_ be nice to you, excuse me, but they are _not_ very bright, Link, there’s no denying that.” Distracted, Link considered how he loved when Ghirahim simply called him by his name, since the other was so fond of calling him ‘Skychild’ or ‘Hero’. ‘Link’ sounded almost intimate. Ghirahim kept going: “So, as I was saying, the Mogma fuckboys didn’t exactly like me.”

“Oh, I fucking wonder why.” Link said, not viciously, but with a smile on his lips, his full spoon halfway to his mouth.

“Shush, you, I was a perfect gentleman with those brainless mole-like nightmares. So there I was, knowing full well that ugly-ass Mogma – and he was specially ugly, he had his green hair up in some fucked up hairdo-”

“Dude!” Link tried to say, but he had a mouthful of soup, so it came out more like ‘Duuh’. Ghirahim laughed, Link swallowed and tried again. “Dude, I know this one, what was that freak’s name, Co… Co-something?”

“Hey! Don’t call him a freak, he was _nice_!” Ghirahim did a perfect imitation of Link’s tone of voice, managing to sound ironic all the same.

“Cobal! His name was Cobal. I could never figure if he and Ledd were brothers or if they were fucking.”

“Goddess Hylia, Link, don’t give me the mental image of Mogmas fucking while I’m trying to eat.”

“How do you think they reproduce, o’ Lord Ghirahim?” Link made crude motions with his fingers, wiggling his eyebrows. That was another thing he actually loved: he could be as crude as he liked with Ghirahim and the demon was never shocked. Maybe because he was, well, a demon.

“Well, I can tell you for sure it’s not through butt-fucking, what are they teaching you in the Academy Sex-Ed? Cobal can drown his sweetheart in come, they won’t be getting any mini-Mogmas any time soon.”

Link laughed freely at that, almost choking on his wine.

“C’mon, you were telling me about your meeting with Cobal.”

“Yes, I was. I knew the fucker had a piece of heart in his little kleptomaniacal hands, but I couldn’t very well kill the bastard without good reason.”

“That hair was good reason.”

“I know, right? So, anyway, yadda yadda, yadda yadda, as conversations go, I ended up saying that we, demons, were superior beings and that I could do everything better than those lesser beings.”

“And you wonder why he didn’t like you.”

“I mean, I just said the obvious, right? Profoundly hurt in an honor I didn’t knew he possessed, Cobal-dear dared me to pass the ultimate Mogma pain test. I said, ‘Bring it on, bitch!’, and turned into my most resistant self, that you are quite familiar.”

“Oh, I do love your metal!Mario outfit.” Link said with a wink.

“I knew you had a soft spot for it, or is it a hard one, hm?” Ghirahim gave him a wink of his own, and carried on. “But guess the fucking what was the fucking pain test?”

“I’m guessing it was not good.”

“No, it fucking wasn’t, Skychild. It was a fucking bath in fucking lava. And you know what happens to metal at high temperatures?”

Link couldn’t help it: he laughed his ass off.

Of course, the hilarity came easy because he knew Ghirahim couldn’t have been seriously hurt if he’s telling the story now, and he could hear the chuckles coming from the demon.

“So there I was, standing by a bath filled with lava knowing full well I was going to get my beautiful face wrinkled if I so much got closer to the thing, and knowing I also had to catch that piece of heart and defend my people’s honor. What do you think I did?”

“Well, I know you didn’t kill Cobal because I met the little dude after, and I know you didn’t get into the bath because you’re still a gorgeous asshole, so I have no solution for your dilemma.”

“That’s the second compliment you pay me tonight.” Ghirahim said, and his expression was surprisingly open, as if he was actually waiting for an answer. As Link had none to offer, he just shrugged, to which the demon said: “Must be the wine.”

“Must be.” Link agreed with a smile, knocking his glass with Ghirahim’s. “C’mon, the suspense is killing me. What did you do?”

“I knocked the stupid beast out, of course, what the hell do you think I did? Pretended I need to stretch myself out before I took the bath, did a quick ballet-like spin and bitch-slap Cobal into a restful sleep.”

“You thief! J’accuse!” Link threw another napkin at Ghirahim. “The poor bastard! I remember your slaps, they sting like hell.”

“Oh, shush, I’ve never hit you hard. They were all love taps.”

“Ha! Sure, we’ll call it that now.”

Ghirahim suddenly looks around, as if remembering where – and with whom – he is.

“Well…” the demon sighed. “Looks like I was right again, and they aren’t coming.”

“Who?”

Ghirahim didn’t seem to listen to him. “Not that I’m particular annoyed at this turn of events, but I did wear my nice cape tonight, and if it weren’t for your sorry presence dining alone I would be left with wine for dinner. That would be very rude.”

“Ghirahim, what are you talking about?”

The demon sighed once again, and turned back to face Link directly. “Your merciful Goddess not only forgave me, but took upon herself the mission of making me happy, even though I’ve been stating repeatedly that I am very much satisfied with my currently life. She set a blind date for me tonight, and they didn’t show.”

Link stared open mouthed at Ghirahim for a whole second, until finally he looked down, realizing that, _of course_ , Ghirahim was his date. Of course. It made sense, actually, Link thought, smiling down at his – almost empty – plate. Ghirahim knew what he had been through, Ghirahim had his own journey in the war, and they could connect easily over the small things – like knowing the same Mogma down at the Surface. It was weird – they had way too much bad blood between them – but it also made sense. Like Zelda’s hair choices.

“But don’t worry, Skychild.” Ghirahim kept going, surely mistaken Link’s silence for pity. “I don’t really blame them. I mean, most Skyloftians have no idea what happened… well, what happened between the three of us, I suppose, you, me and the Goddess. But they all seem to understand I had a bad place in it, as if at least that part of the story was quite clear.”

Link’s head shot up at this. “We haven’t told anyone. Not me, not Zelda, not even Groose. We swore to never tell anyone you were the one that raised Demise. They don’t know, and honestly, they wouldn’t understand if they did.”

“But they don’t like me, Link. Look me in the eyes and tell me I’m mistaken.”

Link looked, but couldn’t very well deny what they both knew was true. “They are not used to outsiders, they don’t understand you. The Goddess’ haven in the sky protected our people but also isolated us, you know that. They don’t know how to deal with someone who’s so different. That’s why we need to get back to the Surface as soon as possible, and we all know you’re being fundamental to our transition.”

“Yeah, well…” Ghirahim took a sip of his wine, discovered an empty glass again, and filled both of their cups. “Apparently being a good citizen doesn’t make me more datable, otherwise they would be here, right?”

Link laughed, rubbed his hand over his face, feeling himself blush.

“Ghirahim, man, look… maybe they were here.”

“What, you think they left? After only 45 minutes of lateness? The audacity!”

“ _Only_? Dude, what mushrooms have you been hitting, 45 minutes is a fucking long time to wait for someone! 45 minutes means you’re not coming!”

“No, 45 minutes means I’m actually choosing my better cape and fixing my hair in the best possible angle, they should be thankful.”

“I’m calling bullshit on that one, Demon Lord.” Link chuckled, suddenly realizing something. “You were afraid of facing the music, that’s why you were so late. I know you spend hours on your hair and makeup every day, you’re used with it enough to plan ahead; besides, you use magic as a way of transportation, there’s no reason in the world for you to be this late.”

“Well, if they wanted to see me, they should have stayed!” Ghirahim said, unable to deny Link’s accusations. “It’s obvious this couldn’t have worked if I’m not worth their time of the day.”

Link laughs again. “What I’m saying, dude, is what if they stayed?”

Ghirahim gave no signs of following Link’s line of thought. “But then, where ar-”

The door opened. In came Pipit.

“Oh, there you are, you two! Having fun on your date?”

“Our… date?” Ghirahim looked truly scandalized from Link to the soup to the wine, as if all three elements had simultaneously betrayed him.

“It’s been four hours already?” Link couldn’t believe it.

“Sure, man! Hey, Ghirahim, how’s it going?” Pipit didn’t wait for an answer. “I know it’s kinda of awkward to barge in on your date like this, but Link here still can’t fly at night and I promised Zelda I would bring him back by midnight. I think she was a bit afraid you two would kill each other, with the way you’re always fighting, but it seems to me you two had fun, right?”

Ghirahim was still staring at his wine, profoundly shocked.

“Fun!” Link said aloud, after a beat. “Yeah, sure, we had loads of funs.”

A chuckle. Link was relieved to see it was Ghirahim. Apparently the spell could be broken by the opportunity of laugh of Link’s conversational skills.

“‘Loads of funs’, by Hylia, could you _be_ more awkward?” their eyes crossed for a moment, humor on the demon’s expression, but Ghirahim looked away again after a second.

“…Ooookay!” Pipit smiled like a crazy man, probably assuming the blushing and the averted eyes meant something else altogether. “Tell you guys what, I’ll wait for Link outside, alright? Good night, Ghirahim!”

“Bye.” Ghirahim answered, and Link knew he was disturbed – the demon was never this polite.

Link rose from his chair and the other rose as well, looking readier for a physical fight than for the end of a date.

“Look, Ghirahim…” Link forced himself to face the other. He could say many things. Could tell him he actually had fun that night, that it was the best date he ever had. Could tell him he deserved happiness in his life, and not just contentment, and that Link would enjoy being part of it. Could tell him he wouldn’t be an outsider forever, that things would get easier once they were all settled in the Surface. Could tell him he’d wanted to kiss him for most of the night. He could…

“Do you have any plans for next Saturday?” Ghirahim beat him to it. “Groose told me there’s a nice picnic spot near the entrance of Lake Floria. Kikwis and I don’t get along so well, but I figured I’d have a free pass if I was to come along with the Hero.”

Link chuckled. Leave to Ghirahim to simplify matters into a simple yes or no question.

“I would like that, actually.” Link answered with a bright smile, to which Ghirahim’s answer was a simple, dignified nod. “See ya then, I suppose.”

“I suppose.”

A long moment passed between them, silent staring each other, half challenge, half heated desire. Link realized it wasn’t the first time they’ve stared at each other like this.

Link made himself walk away from the table, but as he passed Ghirahim, he couldn’t help but press his lips into the other’s cheek, fingers tangling in soft white hair.

“This” he whispered into the demon’s ear. “was so much better than I had anticipated. I can’t wait to see you again.”

As he walked down the stairs, he listened, in Ghirahim’s clear voice:

“Praised be Hylia!” and a loud snap filled the air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (my doctorate's test is finally over. had to read the most annoying Foucault's work. relieved and tired right now. kinda of mad with my best friend. kinda of late to the kpop party, but suddenly in love with SHINee. 25 is too old to be in love with SHINee, isn't it?)
> 
> I check my phone all the time at random hours of the day to see if any of you wrote me a little something. Comments are love! <3


	4. Secret Relationship - Canon Verse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon Verse - Secret Relationship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Lo Little Demons! I've been busy, busy, busy, so fucking busy. So fucking busy is not even funny. But, good news: I WAS ACCEPTED IN THE DOCTORATE'S PROGRAM!!!!! Look me in the eyes and tell me it's not THE SHIT this bitch is going to be a Philosophy Doctor in 4 years? Sheeeeeeeeeeeit. I'm happy. Hope you enjoy this stuff!

Link tried to focus on Gaepora’s words, but it was hard. He knew the man was probably saying something important about the new constructions on the Surface – probably. But his mind kept wandering elsewhere, since he was waiting for- there. There it was. The first sign.

Outside the window behind the older man’s back, Link could see a subtle white smoke coming from somewhere on the woods.

“…so we’ll probably need Beetle’s help to find-”

“I’m sorry, Headmaster Gaepora.” Link said as respectfully as he managed, already getting up, the lie on the tip of his tongue. “I just felt a heavy something in my chest. I believe my bird might be in trouble. I should leave and find her right away.”

“Oh, again?”

“What?” asked Link, absently trying to calculate how much time would take him to get to the entrance of the Skyview Temple.

“What? I mean… oh, really?” Gaepora lied poorly. “So, get going, Link. We can talk later, my boy. Have fun!”

“Of course, I’ll be back as soon as Crimson is alright!” Link lied just as poorly, already out of the room and running outside.

Wait, did Gaepora told him to have fun?

*

Now, he was sure Gaepora wouldn’t come looking for Crimson, but still he hid the bird behind a waterfall before going towards the smoke. As he suspected, the small, magic fire was burning quietly just outside the entrance of Skyview Temple. Trust the other to be a nostalgic, sap ass.

Link looked around. Where did he… oh, right, the tree! They had agreed to hide the second sign behind the tree with the beehive. Buried just below a root was the folded piece of paper with just two letters written in beautiful calligraphy: L.F.

So. The Lake. Link came back through the same path, trying to avoid Kikwis and Skyloftians alike, but he didn’t have the same luck twice: looking around, he almost ran into Machi.

Fuck.

“Hello, Mister Hero! How are you today? Would you like to drink a nice, herbal tea with me and Lopsa?”

“I’m looking forward to some warm milk, actually.” Link muttered.

“What?”

“What? I mean, no, I mean, unfortunately, I can’t, Machi. Thank you so very much. But I’ll have to fly to… hum… Lanayru soon. I promised I would meet with… with… Skipper, yeah, he’s waiting for me.”

“Oh, I heard he’s a pirate, he’s very dangerous! Mister Hero shouldn’t be meeting with dangerous types!”

_What did this little fucker just said to me?_

“Look here, Machi,” and Link had to bite his own lips to avoid calling him bitch. “I don’t know what you think you know about ‘dangerous types’, but everyone deserves a second chance, alright? Maybe he made some mistakes, and maybe he’s a bit violent, and maybe he’s, okay, alright, maybe he’s batshit crazy, but he has a loyal, noble heart and at least he’s always been courageous enough to fight for what he believes in, unlike some trembling fake lil’ shits that cower at the sight of danger.”

Link took a deep breath. Wow, it actually felt good to get all that out of his chest!

Shit. Machi.

Machi was, of course, trembling, round eyes staring up at Link.

“Mister Hero, I-I never knew you felt so strongly about Skipper.” Oh fuck, yeah, they were talking about Skipper, Link, you idiot. “You should run to meet him soon! I think I saw him near Skyview earlier. I’m sorry to keep you away from him! Bye!”

Machi quickly got out of Link’s way, going up a tree and disappearing as fast as his little legs could take him. But… did he say he saw Skipper earlier in Skyview? The fuck was the walking plant smoking?

*

Link took the scenery route towards Lake Floria, even though he would love nothing else to get there sooner – he was trying his best to avoid meeting anyone else, so he walked longer, climbed some trees and killed some Deku Babas but finally reached the entrance of the Ancient Cistern. From there he could swim back through Faron’s room.

Now, the thing was: how to cross Faron’s room without being seen by the dragon or those little Parellas dudes and dudettes. He needed a diversion.

Link saw a Water Froak floating around nearby. He always felt like such a jerk for exploding the guys that were, usually, just chilling, but well, priorities and all that. Swimming so very slowly and close to the walls to avoid being seen, he managed to hit the bottom of the room, attracting the Froak with him. Now came the hard part: he would have to be very, very fast to hit the Froak on the right angle and swim away before anyone had seen him.

Link positioned. With one hard push he threw the bloating Froak towards Faron’s tail.

“WHAT THE FUCKITY FUCK!” Came the thunderous yell, and Link swam faster than he ever did in his life towards the entrance of the room, below all the Parellas that came running to their dragon’s rescue.

Victory! He was out. Now he only had to climb over the waterfalls towards the Lake’s bridge, and he could enjoy some good-

“What are you doing?”

Fucking hell. Jellyf was standing right behind him just as Link aimed his hook at the stonewall.

Did it _had_ to be Jellyf? Fucking Jellyf, that hates his guts and is such an annoying sardine of a person? Link was so tired of this shit.

“Look, Jellyf, do you wanna know the true about what I’m doing here?”

“Yeeees… that’s why I asked.”

“The whole true? Are you sure about that?”

“Just spit it out, pest!”

Link sighed. “The Goddess felt a funky energy coming from the waterfalls on this part of the lake."

"A funky... energy?"

"Yes. We fear it might be some evil part of Demise waiting to awaken. I came to investigate. But this is a secret! A top, Goddess-protected, secret! You can’t tell this to anyone, not even Her Excellence Faron, you hear me?”

“Of course I hear you, Hero.” Jellyf had a strange expression in her eyes, but Link was no fish expert, so he couldn’t tell if she was convinced or not.

“And you must protect yourself. Go away and stay with the other within Faron’s rooms, you’ll be safer there. Don’t come out until tomorrow, alright?”

“…Sure.” Did she sound suspicious? Link’s sure she sounds at least 30% suspicious. “Maybe you should warn the others as well. I saw that pompous idi- I mean, I saw Lord Ghirahim on the bridge not too long ago. Good bye, Hero!”

Maybe she was 35% suspicious.

*

“Fucking finally!” Ghirahim wrapped him in his arms before Link had fully climbed the bridge, bringing the young man over the ledge with ease and kissing him before Link could even look at him. “Feels like I’ve been waiting you forever, Skychild.”

“Tell me about it.” Except no, Link thought, don’t tell me about it, kiss me just like this and let me bite your lips and lick your mouth and pull your hair. “Missed you so much.” Link whispered against Ghirahim’s collarbone, sucking a hickey on the pale neck.

“I was worried they wouldn’t let you come out to play.” Ghirahim sat on bridge’s cold white stone, bringing Link to his lap. The hero complied immediately, straddling Ghirahim’s thighs. “I’m always worried some noise Skyloftian is going to come out to investigate our smoke signs. If they forbid you, were will I find another fucktoy?”

Link laughed against Ghirahim skin, mostly because the ‘heartless-ice-cold-demon’ façade wasn’t as good as it used to be. He could see affection and relief in Ghirahim’s eyes, even if the demon pretended he could discard Link any time.

“Don’t worry. I don’t think anyone is suspicious yet.” And with that, Link occupied his mouth and mind with something far more delicious.

*

Zelda loved those bright afternoons. Here, in Faron Woods, she felt happier than ever, understanding she was fulfilling her destiny and bringing her people back to where they belong. She leaned against a huge branch in the Great Tree, enjoying the breeze coming from Lake Floria.

“Hm, Zelda? Don’t look down the Lake just right now, okay?”

Zelda turned towards Groose, who was as red as a tomato. What could possible- Oh. Oh.

“Are they at it again?” she laughed, trying to rein her curiosity and look for the pairing. Those two were becoming impossible.

“Like rabbits.” Said Groose with a dark expression. “When do you plan to tell them we all know, uhn? It would be so good if Link could bend his demon lover over his own bed, behind closed, thick walls, instead of us getting an eye-full every time they want to ‘secretly’ frick-frack.”

“I double dare you to call it frick-frack in front of Ghirahim the first time we hear they’re fucking.” Groose silently shook Hylia's hand, and they shared a smile. “I’m not planning on telling them, by the way. Link is an adult, after all. He gave us much of himself already; maybe he wishes to keep this part of his life for himself.”

“They should choose better hidden spots then.”

“Be that as it may, maybe he has his own reasons for not telling us, have you thought about that? Maybe he thinks that if he tells us, he’ll make this relationship official, and he wants to take this slower.”

“Zelda, I know you’re his best friend, but I’ll tell you what bothers me, besides, well, the gratuitous porn: sometimes I think Link’s not telling us anything because he fears we’ll judge and condemn this relationship. He believes we still hold grudges against Ghirahim.”

Zelda stood silently for a while, lost in thought.

“You may be right, of course. So we show support. We show them we accept Ghirahim as a part of our community. We treat him with respect and affection. We embrace them. I don’t think we should meddle beyond that.”

“Ah, alright!” Groose raised both hands in surrender. “I’ll deal with the shows, don’t worry. The Goddess knows Link deserves some break.”

Zelda laughed freely at Groose’s slip of tongue. “Yeah, I sure do!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the delay, this chapter was already written before I started to post, but those last days have been crazy.
> 
> ImpureElegance and jinxed_gemstone might rest assured that both of your prompts are coming, because I'm a good girl like that! Hope you like this chapter as well.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!! Any word will bright my day!!!


	5. Fake Relationship - Canon Verse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Canon Verse - Fake Relationship
> 
> Link's debts in the Bazaar are concerning; sharing a room with Fledge is both annoying and traumatizing; and Peatrice still believes they are engaged - even though Link couldn't be gayer.
> 
> Life as a former Hero is not as easy as one would think. Ghirahim might be the solution to at least one of those problems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm in love with this chapter, really. I like him so much he has a summary of it's own - hell, I wanted to post it as a different fic. You guys are under no obligations of liking it as well: writing it was fun enough.
> 
> Hope you enjoy it!
> 
> (P.S.: I'm a cheater. I skipped one prompt on the sheet - Room mates - because I'm stuck on it. You might forgive me if you consider there's a bit of roomating happening in this fic as well!)

Peatrice was quickly becoming a nuisance.

Scratch that.

Peatrice was quickly becoming a goddamn bitch of a fucking problem.

Now, you see, Link had been kind to her. He had been sweet to her. He had been... Well, lying. He never had any intentions of dating, or kissing, or fucking the lady. He just wanted to see her smile a bit, and everyone likes to feel loved, right? He thought he was doing her a favor.

Also, yeah, fuck him, but he also enjoyed feeling wanted. The days he winked at her and complimented her were the difficult days as a Hero, when every time Link got on Crimson he couldn’t know if he would ever come back. At some point, having faced Ghirahim, he figured it wouldn’t be long before the Demon Lord found him and ended him once and for all, in a painful, slow fashion. He was living in borrowed time. So what if he flirted a little on his last hours?

But that was then. This is now.

Now Link is very much alive and has to take responsibility for the decisions he took when he thought he was not going to live another month. That means he somehow has to pay for all the potions bought on credit (oh Hylia in Heaven, how did he _manage_ to drink so many potions); he’ll have to suck it up and go bugs hunting with Stritch on that fucked up island of his just like he promised all those months ago; and he’ll have to deal with his wannabe fiancé Peatrice. Fuck.

“Why can’t I be like Keet?” Link sighed, as if in prayer. Turns out a Goddess answered.

“Like who?” Zelda asked, raising her eyes from the book she was currently reading, both her feet on Link’s bed.

“Keet, the most normal dude in Skyloft. He likes to drink in the Lumpy Pumpkin and he’s dating Kina. He’s probably going to marry her. He has such a nice skin. So fucking normal, why can’t I be that fucking normal?”

Zelda laughed at his misery. “No one is normal when we get to know them.”

“No, dude, you don’t understand, Keet just _is_. When I scanned him with Fi, do you know what she told me? ‘His name is Keet, and oddly enough for Skyloft, he's a very normal boy.’ Do you believe this shit?”

“Why did you use Fi to scan some random boy at the Lumpy Pumpkin?”

“For reasons, Zelda.” Link answered, annoyed. “What if he was Ghirahim in disguise?”

Zelda’s answer was to raise both eyebrows at her Chosen Hero.

“Fine, I was bored, okay? Wanted to know if Fi had any gossip on the guy. He has unfairly nice skin.”

“You sure you want to be like him?” Zelda was back at her book. “You may be more inclined to fuck him, don’t you think?”

“Hey! I like Kina, I wouldn’t sleep with her boyfriend, what kind of slut do you take me for? Don’t answer that. Besides, normal dudes make for lousy fucks, thanks but no thanks.”

“There you go, that’s your answer, the reason why you’re not normal.”

“Oh, thank you so much, Goddess.” Link said in mock appreciation. “You made my life a series of ridiculously weird events, but at least I know how to take it like a pro. Everything seems so fair now.”

“You’re welcome, child.” Zelda answered with a mock-blessing, still reading her book. “Shouldn’t you be on the Bazaar right now, meeting Pipit and the others for the Surface Security reunion?”

“Yes, I should. But that means I will meet Peatrice and…”

“Oh, you fucking don’t!” Zelda snapped her book shut. “You’re not getting late for a reunion about the future of our people on the Surface because you’re scared of fucking Peatrice! People are counting on you, Link. No one among us knows the Surface better than you.”

“People are always counting on me, Your Holiness.” Link said it with enough venom that Zelda looked like she had just taken a slap. Immediately he regretted, not his words, but the kind of tone he used with her. He didn’t want to apologize, though, so he moved forward. “Besides, they have Ghirahim now, what do they need me for?”

“Ghirahim may be useful but he’s not very easy to communicate with, he’s half the reason why they need you there. Most people don’t know how to deal with him, you’re the only one he listens to. If you’re not there, this meeting will surely end in tears. Or dead bodies, if we’re being more realistic.”

“But… Peatrice!” Link whined. “I don’t wanna hurt her, you know?”

“Have you tried telling her you like cocks?” Zelda either wasn’t taking this seriously enough or she didn’t know Peatrice enough.

“Yes! I did! Everyone in Skyloft knows I like cocks! She said no man is perfect, that she’ll teach me how to enjoy a real woman once we are married.”

“Ugh, that’s disgusting.”

“I know, can you believe this shit?” Link rose. Zelda was right, of course, he needed to be there for his companions, otherwise the security in the Surface would be compromised and Ghirahim would probable eat them all for dinner. “Wish me luck, at least?”

She raised and kissed him in the cheek. “I know you’re going to find a way. You’re an amazing, intelligent, wonderful man. The fact you’re going through all this just because you don’t want to hurt her shows me more than ever I was right to choose you as our Hero.”

“Yeah, killing Demise was just a test; facing Peatrice was my real destiny.” Zelda laughed freely. “Try not to mess with my room while I’m gone!”

And out was the fearless Hero.

*

“No, no, no.” Link said for what felt like the hundred time. “We can’t try to build stuff in Lanayru just yet: we don’t have enough manpower to map all the quicksand in the area. Besides, do you guys want to live just beside quicksand? Imagine for a second that Kukiel goes running after a kite. I say we stick to Faron woods for now.”

“But both of you said Lanayru didn’t have as much enemies as Faron and Eldin and it has more open fields! It makes sense to move where we won’t have to kill giant flowers!” Hylia Almighty, has Eagus always been this stupid? Link used to look up to this guy. Before he manages to answer, though, Ghirahim’s speaking.

“It has less enemies because not even Deku Babas want to live in the middle of fucking nowhere, you brainless rock of a man.” Link wanted to defend Eagus, but… well, he was behaving like a brainless rock of a man. “If you want to invest somewhere else, we should try Eldin. It has fewer enemies than Faron and we can recycle the Bokoblins habitations for a while.”

“You all seem to forget we are looking for a place to raise our _goddamn kids_ here! Sweet Hylia, do you want to barbecue them? No, don’t answer that.” Link looked over at where Ghirahim was sitting. “What’s your objection to Faron, anyway?”

“We would have to co-habit with the Kikwis.” Ghirahim raised a finger. “Before you go out telling me I should behave, let me clarify I’m not saying it just because I think those walking broccolis are incredibly annoying, but they have their own culture and their own spaces. If Skyloft was to move down to Faron, we would eventually push them away. We can’t just drop down from the sky and take territory just because we’re stronger, it wouldn’t be… good sport.”

Link could feel everyone around exchanging looks. Yes, Ghirahim was being uncharacteristically human and peaceful. But Link wouldn’t look surprised: he knew the demon better than anyone else, knew he wouldn’t attack the weaker unless the weaker was literally standing on his way. So he just inclined himself further on the table, to try and look at the map.

“You’re right, of course. But that leave us with little options. We can’t all fit around the temple, and there’s no use trying Lanayru or Eldin until more men know the Surface as well as we both do – so what do you suggest?”

“Some Bokoblins built a few fortresses just beyond the Fire Sanctuary in Eldin – the place was green enough to look like Faron, but it didn’t have a Kikwi infestation.”

Link bended even further on the table, already standing. “I don’t think I ever explored that area… where was it?”

“Do you know this point, after the Skyview Temple?”

“I didn’t even know there was anything out there, can you point…You know what?” Link circled the table, squeezing himself in the small space between Ghirahim and Karane to look at the map. “Oh, much better. Please point me again.”

Ghirahim helpfully opened his long legs so Link could fit between them, turning his body slightly towards the other. “Here, dear, you see? There’s a passage just over the lava waterfall, if we can move enough men through it, we can try and build a bridge to connect it to the woods behind Skyview. Then we can move the rest of the people – the kids included, and none of them will toast in the process.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Link agreed, inclining himself towards Ghirahim so Karane and Groose could also look at the map. “I think it can work. We should probably visit the place befo-”

“LINK, MY LOVE. MY ONE AND ONLY.”

Link felt instantly dizzy. ‘Till this point, he had managed to avoid Peatrice, sneaking over to the bar without talking to her. But now she had seen him, and he would have to… ugh. Ugh. His shaking legs gave up on him, and he was suddenly falling.

Ghirahim’s hands were on his waist in a second, but that meant he was suddenly sitting on the demon’s lap, facing Peatrice. The girl seamed to pale as she took in the vision.

“Wh-what. What does this mean.” She couldn’t even give the sentence the right inclination.

Zelda words echoed in Link’s mind. Everything seemed to happen in a flash. He was going to find a way.

“I am… sorry?”

“For what.” The girl once again not-asked in the smallest voice, but Link knew she already had her answer.

“I can’t keep doing this to you, Peatrice.” Link wouldn’t dare to look over Ghirahim, staring intently at the girl on the other side of the table. “I tried to change, I tried to be your man… but I’m in love with Ghirahim. I can’t deny myself any longer.”

Don’t look at Ghirahim. Don’t look at Ghirahim. Fuck, Pipit looks like he’s about to laugh in her face. Don’t look at Pipit. Don’t look at fucking Pipit.

“Ghirahim? The Demon Lord Ghirahim?” at least she seemed more alive now, asking questions with the right inclination and everything.

“I know it doesn’t make much sense.” _or at all._ “But… the heart wants what the heart wants.”

“But… Ghirahim?”

Before Link could decide what would take to convince Peatrice, Ghirahim spoke:

“Can we please all focus?” he said with his bitchest voice. “Lady, I know this seems a lot to take in, but it’s actually quite simple: the Hero wants my cock, and who am I to deny what the Chosen of the Goddess wants?” _Ghirahim, please don’t help, please don’t help._ “That being said, we are trying to settle important matters here, far bigger than my honestly monstrous member. If you could please go back to your little hole, I mean, business, all the grow ups have work to do. Besides, Link and I would very much enjoy going to bed earlier.”

Ghirahim finished his little speech with a long, slow lick from Link’s neck to his ear, managing to make him visibly shiver.

Fuck. Did the whole table see that? By the look on their faces, yeah, they’ve seen the licking and the reaction. Fuck.

Peatrice looked… intrigued. Not angry, not mad. Just. She looked like the human personification of a question mark.

“I suppose you did warn me…” she looked at Ghirahim again. “But… Link, Ghirahim? Are you… sure?”

Link could feel Ghirahim’s breath against his neck, could feel one of his legs slightly trembling in impatience. Peatrice would get cut soon if she didn’t start walking.

“Look, Peatrice, I wanted to tell you before but, you have to trust me, the only thing I was afraid of was hurting your feelings. I want you to be happy.”

It was true enough, actually.

“I… believe you.” She took a step back. “I knew I would end up losing you. I just thought… If you were to choose a boy, I thought maybe Pi-”

“Not it! No, not me, nopes!” Pipit happily denied, before his name was even out of her mouth, a huge smile on his lips. “I’m dating Karane, thank you very much, I’m flattered, really, but I’m also so not dating Link, thanks, but no, thanks!”

“He seems so very happy with your misfortune.” Ghirahim whispered right against Link’s ear. The boy only had to turn his face slightly to whisper back.

“His mom owes me money, he’s pissed with me.”

“Ahhh.” Made the demon.

“I think I’ll go now, then.” Peatrice told the table at large, not looking over Link. “I suppose I’ll see you around… maybe.”

“Wait, Peatrice!” Ghirahim gave him a hard pinch in the hips, but Link ignored him. “You are not… hurt, are you?”

She stood there, looking up, as if considering. When she faced him again, she had a firm look in her eyes.

“No, I don’t think I am. You are a good person, Link. You never lied to me. That’s why I’ll be okay.”

Fuck.

*

Peatrice was gone, so Link had to finally face the table. Pipit, Groose and Karane all seemed to understand exactly what had just happened, and the first two were struggling not to laugh too openly about it. His other companions all seemed to be somewhere between shocked and violently surprised. Finally, Horwell cleaned his throat.

“I suppose, hm… congratulations to both of you?”

“Ha ha.” Link tried to inject some authenticity to his laugh, but it came out all too awkward. “No need for congratulations, we, hm…”

“It’s not like we’re married, Gods, we’re just seeing each other.” Ghirahim took over, one hand firmly stopping Link’s attempt of raising himself from his lap. “Now, can we please arrange an expedition to go check this place out? I haven’t been there in ages and Link has never visited this particular site, so we should probably try to see it before making any further plans, don’t you agree?”

The demon managed to successfully get the meeting back on its tracks, diverging the attention from Link, to which the Hero was grateful. He did expend the next half an hour sitting on the sword’s lap, though, slightly confused as to why Ghirahim would want to keep the farce going.

*

When they were finally outside, Link noticed with a half-smile that his companions seemed to scatter faster than usual, saying their good-byes in haste. Link wondered what they thought they would see, if anyone believed Link would just ride Ghirahim’s cock in plain day light just outside the Bazaar. Well, he wouldn’t put it past the Demon Lord, but honestly, what kind of slut did this people take their Hero for?

A question better not answered, after all.

He was soon alone with Ghirahim, anyway. “C’mon, I’ll walk you home.” Which wasn’t that unusual: they often had to discuss matters away from other people, like secret temple doors and other dangers the ordinary Skyloftian was safer not knowing.

“Wanna hold hands?” Ghirahim asked with an easy, open smile on his lips.

“Didn’t take you for a sap fake boyfriend!” Link friendly pushed him, letting his hand rest on the man’s shoulder just in case Ghirahim actually meant his invitation.

“You hurt my feelings, Hero!” Ghirahim took Link’s fingers in his hand, a firm grasp as he pulled the other man towards his home. He was now currently sharing with Batreaux, which he often told Link was terribly messy, but a nice enough roommate to a demon lord, all things considered. “Didn’t I fake gave you roses in our fake anniversary?”

“Uhm, no? I’m pretty sure you fake forgot our fake anniversary.”

“I wouldn’t fake do that!” Ghirahim had the scandalized look perfected, his free hand on his chest.

“Oh, you sure fake did! Everything else might be fake, but the hurt was real!”

Ghirahim laughed freely at that, head throw back, hair falling in cascades.

“But seriously, now…” Link had to know. “Why did you help me? I mean, I know we are in better terms now… I mean, who would have thought?” Link raised their entangled fingers, and they shared a smile. “But you could have pushed me away. Or, anyway, stop pretending the moment Peatrice was gone, that was actually what I was about to do, so… why?”

Ghirahim seemed to choose his words carefully.

“Look, Hero, I've never lied to you when we were enemies trying to destroy each other, I won't begin right now. I'm not just helping you out of the goodness of my heart, as you might have guessed. Let's just say... I need a bit of help with fitting in. The Skyloftians are not exactly very fond of me yet, and let's face it, there's no future for me living among Bokoblins. Who am I to turn to? Mogmas? Dating the Chosing Hero might do my image some good.”

“That... actually makes sense.” Link agreed, because he would have agreed to any shit Ghirahim had spilled as long as he could keep Peatrice away. “So, we have a deal, then? Fake relationship?”

Ghirahim nodded, head tilted to the side. “For a while, I suppose. I don’t think that, hm, _girl_ will need many more clues that you’re not interested in the fair sex.”

“Oh, you’re fair enough for me, pretty boy.” Link answered with a wink.

Again, the easy laugh. Again, the expanse of neck exposed to Link’s eyes. Link wanted to drown in that vision – it wasn’t anything weird. He just deeply enjoyed to see people happy, of course.

Ghirahim sobered up.

“So, Hero… who are you going to tell?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you're a terrible liar that will probably have to count on someone to help you cope with keeping a fake relationship. Who's going to be?”

“Zelda.” Link answered without hesitation. “She already knows I'm scared as hell from Peatrice, so we might as well go with her. How about you?”

A chuckle. “First, Link, I might not enjoy lying, but that’s only because I usually prefer a must direct approach. I am, don’t you forget that, a demon, dear. On the other hand, it’s not like I have so many good friends in Skyloft just dying to hear my heart’s confessions.”

That made Link stop.

“Look, Ghirahim... I know you think everyone is out to get you, but that's not true. If you just open up, I'm sure people would show affection as well. Everyone needs to have at least someone they can count on, someone to help when things get tough.”

“I do have someone.” Ghirahim said with another chuckle.

“Really?”

“Yes. Someone reliable and kind and honest, if not a little stupid. Someone who has seen my worst moments and got terribly hurt by my choices, but still treats me with respect and civility. Come on, Skychild. Who do you think I would turn to if I needed a shoulder, if not you?”

With that, Ghirahim waved his goodbye, leaving Link staring at the flimsy stairs that lead to Ghirahim and Batreaux’s house.

*

You would think fake dating a demon would change one's daily life. Well, it did, but not by much – there was much less inconvenience than it had with Peatrice. For once, they mostly fake dated on the bar in the Bazaar, so Peatrice could see them drinking and occasionally holding hands – that was all the PDA they had agreed on, the occasional hand holding, sometimes an arm wrapped around a shoulder. Ghirahim, of course, kept trying to push things a little, with the occasional lick and, once or twice, a pinch in Link’s derriere. Link would put up some token resistance, but would glue himself to the demon’s side just as often, enjoying his warmth.

On the other hand, Ghirahim didn’t have a father that would demand a wedding date out of Link like Peatrice had: one night, lying in bed, Link realized it would be probably Demise’s prerogative of doing so, and he most likely would be a lot scarier than Peater. The disturbing mental image of asking for Demise’s permission to date his blushing, virginal, murderous, psychopath sword kept Link awake for most of the night, on the verge of hysterical laughing.

All that being said, maybe the whole fake dating thing was worth it just to see people’s reaction. Headmaster Gaepora tried to tell Link all the lies that some bad mouths have been spreading across Skyloft, just to gasp as Link confirmed it to be all true; Henya started giving him some soup take outs, claiming his ‘young man’ was ‘way too thin and pale’; and Kina laughed in his face for over twenty minutes, finally confessed Pipit had already told her it was all a scheme, and proceeded to laugh in his face for another twenty minutes. Then bought him a drink for his trouble.

All in all, it was all kinds of fun. Tricking people, exchanging secret smiles while they lied through their teeth was, honestly, awesome. People got horrified with it enough that Link started to feel some sick pleasure from sitting on Ghirahim’s lap on random places; it was freeing to finally be the Hero but don’t behave exactly like people expected him to behave. Besides, _Ghirahim_ was fun. He kept bad mouthing people and having bitch fits just to see Link smiling. They had nice enough evenings, drinking in the Bazaar and lazily walking back to Ghirahim’s home, laughing freely at their daily shenanigans.

*

Things were good in Link’s life, finally. They got a new route to move people from Skyloft to the Surface, they were managing to clean all the living areas from the remaining Bokoblins, and he had the best drink companion on all land, what with his dirty stories and loud swearing. Everything was good, really.

There were, of course, things that could be improved: Link wasn’t single anymore, but he wasn’t really really dating, that is, there was little hope for sex in his future. He was still very much in debt with Luv and Bertie – and fuck, was he scared of Luv. He still had a shithole for a room, where he had to listen to Fledge’s moans and pray the boy was just doing push-ups late at night. He still couldn’t figure out how that fucking clown Dodoh was tricking him in that fucking game of his. But anyway, those were ordinary problems that he could live with. All in all, life was good.

And his fake relationship with Ghirahim never ceased to be a source of amusement.

The best of all? Telling people about their first kiss.

“Link brought me a flower from the Life Tree. The most beautiful, delicate, sweet-scenting flower you have ever seen. In fact, it glowed! He said that flower was _nothing_ compared to _my_ beauty. I just had to kiss him then.” Ghirahim told a wide-eyed Cawlin.

“Gigi, oh, that sap fool, Gigi!” Link told Jakamar, who seemed unable to understand they were dating. “We were hunting Bokoblins on the Surface, and one of those monsters was ready to shoot me in the back. That stupid, stupid beautiful person just threw himself in front of an arrow. Actually, scratch that, he threw himself in front of a poisoned arrow! As I desperately flew back here to give him a red potion, he told me, in my arms, in what he thought was his dying breath, that he would do anything for the man he was _sooooo_ in love with. I just had to kiss him!”

“My pretty baby-boy, Link-poo, raised another Silent Realm and faced every single Guardian just to tell me I was the light that illuminates his spirit!” Ghirahim told a teared eyed Gondo, and Link agreed he probably couldn’t top that sacrifice with any ridiculous story of his own.

“Pipit set us up!” They both happily told Mallara about her son, which earned them both Pipit’s bad eye for a whole week.

*

“And then I-I told her… I told her… oh Goddess… I told her it was a-a good thing you already had experience being pier – I, I can’t – being pierced by my sword!”

“YOU DID NOT!”

Ghirahim was rolling in the grass just outside the cemetery, tears streaming down his face as he laughed like a maniac. They were both drunk out of their minds, because Piper kept serving them the Bazaar’s new brew, that tasted like shit but was free, so.

“Ssshhhhh!” Link signaled him silence, even though he couldn’t reign his own giggles.

“Wh-why? Who am I going to wake up, the dead?”

“It, hahaha, it wouldn’t be the first time!” Link tripped over a grave, laughing so hard.

“Fuck off, that was one lil’ Demon Ki-King!” Ghirahim raised himself from the ground, only to sway as he kept one finger up for emphasis. “Now come give your wife-y a goodnight kiss, I’m going down that hole I call a home.”

Link gave a peck on the puckered lips presented, because he couldn’t figure that was anything wrong with that.

Ghirahim swayed once again.

“You sure you okay to go down, man?”

“On you?”

“Fuck off, aren’t you gonna slip on that fuckin’ flimsy stair-thingy?”

Ghirahim seemed to consider that for a second. He clicked his tongue and flipped his hair.

“I’m a de-mon, boy. Deeeeeeeeee-mooooooooooooon. I ain’t gonna fall no stairs, who d’ya think I am? Silly boy.” Ghirahim patted him on the shoulder, messed his hair and gave him another peck on the lips, going his way.

Link’s next words would be to offer Ghirahim to sleep on his floor, but he wouldn’t if the guy was going to be a fucking asshole about being the all-powerful Demon Lord.

Link turned around, heading to his own home, considering the headache he was surely going to have tomorrow, when something else came to his mind. The dude could teleport, right?

“Hey, Ghirahim, why dontcha-”

“FUCK! HELP!”

Link desperately ran back towards the entrance in the cemetery. He looked down the hole and could only see Ghirahim’s hands on the bridge down below. Fuck! He knew the other wouldn’t hang for much longer, so Link jumped all the way down, not taking the stair.

He fell hard, a loud cracking noise coming from his right leg. Fuck, it hurt.

He could worry about that later.

Lying with his stomach against that _STUPID fucking-ass weak bridge_ , Link quickly reached for Ghirahim’s hands. He tried to pull him up, but the demon was too heavy. Even as he put all his strength behind his pull, the metal-sword was impossible to move. Link couldn’t do it.

Desperate, crying, in pain, dizzy with alcohol and adrenaline, Link still held Ghirahim’s hands, unable to pull him up, sweat and fear making it hard to keep his grip. He couldn’t even look the demon in the eyes, afraid of what he would see there. His heart was beating so hard he thought it would stop soon.

“BATREAUX! BATREAUX, FUCK, HELP! HELP, BATS, PLEASE, HELP US!”

He kept yelling into the night, Ghirahim’s fingers between his own. It felt an eternity later – but it couldn’t be a minute, really – when the door slammed open and Batreaux came running out, one of his long sickles in his hands.

The guy was human now, but he was still a big, strong dude with big, strong hands. Together, he and Link managed to bring Ghirahim back up. Link’s last memory of that night was lying side by side with a bleeding Ghirahim on that _fucking wooden bridge_ , breathing hard, hands dripping with sweat but fingers still tangled with the demon, the strongest sense of relief washing over him. The next second, pain took over and he proceeded to pass out.

*

Link woke up to the strong smell of a red potion, followed quickly by the taste of it down his throat. His first thought was:

“ _I can’t drink this, I’ll have to sell my ass on the streets to pay for it._ ”

Followed by:

“ _Ghirahim was bleeding._ ”

The second thought woke him up faster than the red potion, and he immediately tried to sit up and see around him. Quickly he realized he was still in Batreaux and Ghirahim’s place. He also realized the place was… unusually crowded.

He could see Ghirahim sitting beside him soon enough: they were both sharing Ghirahim’s single bed, so it would be hard to miss him. The demon looked fine enough, sitting with a steaming cup of something between his fingers, dark bruises on his chest (visible because Ghirahim was such an exhibitionist and his clothes didn’t hide much) and an open, but small, wound on his forehead.

There was Batreaux, of course, still looking shaken and being consoled by Pipit, of all people. There was Zelda, holding half a bottle of a red potion she knew damn well Link was in no position to pay for. There was also Headmaster Gaepora and Horwell, talking in low voices in a corner. All in all, the small place was way too crowded.

It was already morning.

“Ghirahim…” Link’s voice was fucked, he must have yelled himself hoarse the night before. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” He smiled, but it was forced. He didn’t look okay, he looked shaken and frightened and still recovering. “I have a headache, but we don’t know if it was the hit or the hung over.” A pause. “You shouldn’t have done that, Link.”

Link looked around, but everyone was pretending not to hear a conversation happening three feet over. Fine, he would just have to mutter his angry response.

“ _I_ shouldn’t have done that? Why didn’t you listen to me, you asshole?” Link took a deep breath, continued in an even lower voice. “Why couldn’t you sleep on my floor like a normal drunk idiot?”

“You didn’t offer that, now did you?” Ghirahim pointed out, equally muttering. “Why didn’t you let me fall? One of the knights would have got me, they always get us.”

“I didn’t…” Link swallowed, cleared his throat, started again. “I didn’t thought about that, I couldn’t remember. I was drunk, remember? I saw you hanging there and I could only think about you falling and I-I panicked. Fuck.”

Ghirahim reached for his fingers, and his touch almost sent Link into a nervous breakdown, the images of the night before coming unrequested. He managed to keep his shit together on the last second, though, tightening his grip.

“Why didn’t _you_ teleported, though?”

Ghirahim bit his lower lip, deep in thought.

“I suppose I panicked as well. I… fuck, it’s been so long since I teleported, it’s not an instinct as it used to be.”

“Why not?”

“It just isn’t.”

“Yeah, but why not? Why don’t you teleport anymore?”

“I don’t feel like it.”

“But it’s so easier and it saves so much time, why would you rather…”

“I like our walks, okay?!” Ghirahim raised his voice. They both looked around, but the other five inhabitants of the small room just pretended to look at the interesting spider-webs patterns on the walls. Ghirahim kept going in a lower tone. “I actually enjoy it when you walk me home. I don’t want to cut our nights short by disappearing.”

Link just stared and Ghirahim’s face, unable to think of an answer. Luckily, Gaepora came to his rescue.

“As much as I would like to leave the couple to discuss the matters, we are all here to try and help the two of you with the issues this unfortunate accident has brought to our attentions.”

“You are _all_ here to help us? All of you?”

“No, I came here to help Batreaux.” Pipit answered with a sly smile. “You two fuckers can somersault into the night for all I care.”

“Oh, like you weren’t crying like a little baby when you saw them both lying on that bed.” Zelda pushed Pipit so hard he almost fell into poor Batreaux’s lap. “I, on the other hand, came here just to yell at you for breaking a fucking leg. You can destroy Demise but can’t jump a single stair without breaking a leg, what the hell, Hero?”

“Should have left it broken.” Link muttered like the ungrateful little bastard he knew he was, knowing the red potion had healed him entirely. “That potion’s price is going to be harder to face than one lousy broken bone.”

“Be that as it may,” Gaepora cut in, ending the discussion. “We’ve come to realize the three of you – Link, Lord Ghirahim and good ol’ Batreaux – are being deeply wronged by our community.”

“Are we?” Link asked, just as Ghirahim elbowed him hard on his ribs.

“Batreaux, here, was once wrongly taken as a monster. Because we didn’t know better, he had to live as a pariah, hidden from all. Now we all know he’s a gentle, kind man with a heart of gold. He should be allowed to see the light of day.”

Uncle Bats had tears in his eyes, because he was a pussy like that, Link considered.

“Lord Ghirahim, on the other hand, came to our community burdened with a past of blood and death. Even though Zelda decided we shouldn’t punish him, Skyloftians distrusted and alienated him, pushing him to live away from our families. But after a year living with us, we can no longer fool ourselves: you’re a trustworthy man, honorable and loyal. If our Hero can respect and even love you, who are we to treat you like a second-class citizen?”

Ghirahim didn’t dare to look over Link, but the Hero felt the demon’s fingers under the duvet pressing against his leg insistently, as if saying “Are you hearing that? Are you fuck hearing that?”. Link was fucking hearing that. Ghirahim’s plan had finally proved its worth.

“Finally, Link, our Hero, the Chosen One. You were once a child, a student that had so much to learn in our Academy. The truth is, since you came back from the Surface, you’re the one teaching us all. It’s not fair to keep you in a child’s room, as if we can’t see the man you have become. You’re an adult now. We must treat you as one.”

Link knew his mouth was hanging open. He knew it. He couldn’t close it.

“The three of you simply cannot keep living like that. I’ve thought about this for a long time, but I believed we could wait until we were all settled on the Surface. Last night’s accident showed us how urgent the situation actually is. Besides, it has come to my attention that…” Gaepora stopped, looked around. No one was about to come to his aid, apparently. “You two have constantly displayed your… hm… affections. In public, that is. We believe that behavior would decrease the moment you had your own space to… hm… enjoy intimacy.”

Zelda made a crude hand motion behind her father’s back.

(And on that note, how dare the fuckers? Anyone listening would think Link had been sucking Ghirahim’s cock on broad daylight every other Tuesday!)

“So what dad’s saying” Zelda took over. “is that we decided that… it’s time we change this injustices. If you all agree with it, of course.”

“ _I agree with it, I so agree with it._ ” Link silently prayed towards his beautiful, blonde, gorgeous Goddess, hoping she would be able to hear him.

“We want you to be comfortable, and happy.” Gaepora said with finality. “So we’re proposing you and Ghirahim get a home to yourselves, right next to our dear Mallara’s home. We don’t have much space in Skyloft, so we thought about giving Batreaux your old room, Link, just until we get everyone on the Surface in safety.”

Link could feel Ghirahim wasn’t breathing beside him. He didn’t think he was breathing either. The silence was deafening.

“I know it’s a lot to take.” Horwell finally decided to say something. “You are both still scared from last night, and living together… can be quite a challenge to a young couple. You don’t have to answer us now, of course. But we do believe it would be an elegant solution to your living issues, since we really don’t have that much space in Skyloft. Besides, if anyone is ready for it, it would be the two of you. Your love can conquer anything… just thinking about how you shared your first kiss brings tears to my eyes!”

Their first kiss? Fuck, Link couldn’t even remember which lie they’ve told Horwell. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

“We will let you both rest and think.” Zelda said with a smile, clearly avoiding that everyone witnessed Link’s mental breakdown.

Fuck.

*

In the end, there wasn’t really a question to be considered: Link was fucking tired of listening to every fart Fledge brought to life, and he couldn’t even consider letting Ghirahim down those fucking stairs ever again, sober or not. There was also poor Batreaux, the guy deserved a break, and he was social enough that the life on the Academy would come as a nice change for him.

And he would also have a chance to fuck with Pipit’s patience anytime he went to visit his mom. That would be totally awesome.

Still, Link felt kind of bad about it. He was getting his own home under false pretense – there was no relationship, they weren’t really a couple. It wasn’t honorable, and it wasn’t the right thing to do. He took his problems to Groose and Zelda, who, after all, already knew he was a lying liar that lies.

“I don’t see the problem here, I was the one who insisted with dad he found a solution.” Zelda said, while the three of them cleaned Impa’s memorial. “Relationship or not, that hole Batreaux and Ghirahim are sharing is a shame for our community. You think I liked hearing Ghirahim fell down those horrible stairs that night? Do you think any of us were happy, or calm, or satisfied with seeing you both hurt and bleeding on that bed?”

“Man, I’ll tell you what:” Groose said, in his serious-shit voice. “You are our fucking Hero. You may think you only did your duty, but you worked damn hard to keep us all safe and you’re still working hard for the future of this people. You sacrificed a lot, you are entitled to take some things, bro. To live a little. If living a little means having your own four walls and a demon for a boyfriend, fuck, I don’t think anyone has the right to deny you.”

“But that’s the point, Groose: you’re forgetting I _don’t_ have a demon for boyfriend. I’d be lying.”

Groose and Zelda exchanged subtle looks, but the taller boy just answered: “Lie, then, bro. Lie all you have to until those assholes give you everything you deserve. I’m with Zelda on that one. I don’t see the problem here.”

Well, and there wasn’t a problem, was there? They were offering him a home of his own, with windows and a door and a bathroom that wasn’t hogged by Gaepora every single night. He would be able to choose the plants and the paintings and the furniture, he would be able to cook his own food and clean whenever he felt like.

Only, he would have to do it with Ghirahim.

The prospect… wasn’t as scary as it should have been. That wasn’t too much of a challenge, after all. They could… cohabit. Link was sure of it.

*

(By that time, Zelda told him: “If he ever annoys you too much, you can always come visit me. Or you could, I don’t know, bend him over and fuck him silly.” At Link’s shocked expression, she just shrugged. “What? It’s not like you don’t like cocks, and he’s an attractive dude. I’m not telling you to marry the guy, I’m just saying, you’ll have a bed right there, it would be foolish to waste it.”)

*

“DEMON LORD GHIRAHIM, YOU ASSHOLE.” Link finally yelled, sick and tired. “Get up from this fucking couch, you lazy bitch. I’m not your fucking maid! Can’t you see I’m trying to clean stuff around here, and you’re just-”

Ghirahim snapped his fingers and, with a loud clicking sound, the house was suddenly clean. Impeccable. Perfect.

Link couldn’t believe the audacity.

“Fucking hell, Ghirahim!” He threw the broom on his hand on the floor, immediately pulling his dirty shirt over his chest and walking towards the bathroom for a quick shower. “If you could do this all along, why did you let me tire my ass all morning, asshole?”

The demon followed him all the way to the bathroom.

“Oh, I thought you were enjoying it!” Link slammed the door on Ghirahim’s face, taking grand pleasure in the act. The other kept yelling through it. “No, seriously! You’re always offering to clean Mallara’s house, I thought you liked those menial works.”

Link quickly got under the stream of water that constantly spurted from an opening on the wall, coming from the waterfall. Oh, it felt so good just to be clean!

“She pays me, you cretin.” He threw some scented oils on his body without really caring about the process, he just wanted to be clean fast. “I still owe Luv’s money, and I love knowing Pipit has to pay it. That doesn’t mean I live slaving myself cleaning the house.”

“Well, maybe I thought some exercise would do you good!” came Ghirahim’s answer from the other side of the door.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Link let the water wash his hair one more time, and got out to dry himself.

“Well, Hero of mine, how long has it been since you’ve sparred or trained? I don’t want you to, hmm… lose your figure.”

Link opened the door, only a tower wrapped around his waist, pissed as hell.

“Are you fucking calling me fat?”

Ghirahim leaned over the threshold, licking his lips in the same way Link remembers from all those years back in Skyview Temple, scanning Link’s almost naked body.

“Oh, I would never, Skychild. In fact, you look good enough to _eat_.” Link took a step back into the bathroom, Ghirahim immediately took two forward. “What is it, Link? Are you scared of your own dear boyfriend?”

_This fucking puta._

“Ghirahim, babe…” Link pulled him by his iconic red cape, making the taller man lean down to his high, a hand on the wall right behind Link’s head. “You think I’m the same scared little bird you could chicken out, like when we first met? Sorry to ruin your hopes, but you can’t out gay me.”

Ghirahim laughed, apparently surprised by Link’s reaction. They were standing so, so close right now. The demon tilted his head, making to lick Link’s earlobe. Link was faster, though, and before Ghirahim could change his angle, he was kissing the other man in the lips.

Things went to shit from that point on.

Link’s towel was on the floor faster than you could say “butt naked”. Ghirahim’s hands were on his hair, on his shoulders, teasing his nipples, travelling his body so fast Link was getting dizzy with it. Fuck that noise, he was here to prove he could be gayer than Ghirahim, and he would win this or die trying. Soon, Link’s hands were palming around the demon’s still covered cock, and he could hear the other moaning against the skin of his own neck. Good. Perfect.

But Ghirahim was nothing if not persistent: a few moments of Link rubbing against him and fisting his cock, Ghirahim was falling to his knees in front of the Hero. Fuck, but that was a vision. A gorgeous, gorgeous vision of the Demon Lord opening his mouth to lick and then suck the head of his cock, tongue twirling inside as he bobbed his head up and down Link’s length.

It was the dirtiest moment of the Hero’s life, a wet, messy blowjob that left him trembling. Link had to conjure all his strength to avoid coming down Ghirahim’s throat. Proving once again to be the true Hero, Link managed to think ahead enough to gather some of the bathing oil in his fingers while Ghirahim sucked him off. The next moment he was fucking a finger in and out of himself, stretching his own hole, while pushing Ghirahim away: there was no way he would be able to enjoy both stimulations and not come.

Kneeling and proceeding to present himself in all fours, Link spread his ass cheeks, a silent offer Ghirahim would have to be blind not to understand. He risked turning around to see him, and in that moment – ass stretched and presented, completely naked, on all fours, breathing hard and moaning, hard as nails and begging to be fucked – Link knew. Knew he had finally won. He had out-gayed Ghirahim.

The hard fuck that he received after that was just his reward, after all.

*

Life was _fucking, amanzingly_ good. If he once thought he was satisfied, this, right here? Was another ball game entirely. Groose was right, he had bleed himself dry for Skyloft, it was time he took some pleasure for himself, and boy, was he taking pleasure after pleasure _after goddamn pleasure_.

Link felt the muscles of his thighs complain, and he wasn’t sure it was all the running all day between the Surface and Skyloft to bring down so many important things the community would need down here, or if it had been pounding hard into Ghirahim’s sweet hole the whole night before. Either way, the pain felt good, felt wonderful. He loved that pain.

He had found the perfect solution for his sexless life, hasn’t he? Now he could have all the sex he wanted without the weight of a relationship, because he was already in the fake relationship he needed, so he could just ignore all that awkward fumbling with feelings and emotional bounds and gosh, dates. They just had to live their lives as they had been doing for the past, what, six, eight months? And whenever they felt like it, sex! Emotional, relationship, problems free sex!

Ghirahim was the perfect solution: he was already happy with not having a relationship with Link; he was perfectly attractive – in fact, Link would go as far as saying the demon was hot as hell, if the pun wasn’t so ridiculous; and he was so indescribable good at making Link come.

So they fucked and sucked and jerked in every corner available on their own house, and wasn’t that a wonderful development as well, that they wouldn’t have to sneak around anyone to fuck like rabbits? Gaepora was a genius, if only Link had perceived it on their first week living together, instead of taking fucking forever (a whole month!) to realize he could be having free orgasms inside Ghirahim’s lovely, lovely mouth.

But that was all in the past. Now was the goddamn future. And the future was gorgeous.

*

“And I don’t know, maybe Karane won’t want to live together after we’re down in the Surface?” Pipit was saying, all shy and miserable, the poor fucker. “It’s a big move, and I’m kinda of afraid of asking her, but I think it could be alright, don’t you think?”

“I think she loves you, man.” Groose answered. “I’ve know her for quite some time, you guys have been dating forever. You should go for it, you’re ready. Don’t be a pussy, if Stritch asked Peatrice you can ask her!”

“Stritch and Peatrice are going to live together? Stritch and Peatrice are _together_?” Link asked, suddenly shocked.

“Hylia’s balls, Link.” Zelda have been taken to say ‘Hylia’s balls’ lately, and no one could accuse her of blasphemy. It was fucking annoying. “Where have you been lately? I thought you were all worried about the girl’s feelings.”

“Yeah, back when she was my problem.” Links said, and proceeded to realize something: Peatrice haven’t been his problem for a long while. In fact, he and Ghirahim haven’t even been doing fake dates in the Bazaar for a few months now: they had been drinking on the Lumpy Pumpkin, where they could always find an empty table in a more secluded corner. “Anyway, forget about the fact I’m not up to the latest gossip, Groose was talking.”

“Well, I’ve pretty much said it all. I may not be a relationship expert, but that girl is crazy about you.”

“Yeah, but like…” Pipit seemed to struggle with his feelings, and Link considered it must be tiresome to really like someone. “I’m afraid things may change between us after we’re living together, you know? Link, what do you think?”

Immediately, Link raised both his hands. “I’m not the right person for you to ask that, man. What do I know about real relationships?”

Pipit stared at him.

“Dude, you’re living with Ghirahim for how long now, anyway?”

“Yeah, totally different story, though. We are fake. It’s not like we are actually in a relationship.”

His three friends exchanged looks. They didn’t even try to be subtle about that. Zelda extensively rolled her eyes. The disrespect, man, what the hell.

“Okay, let’s pretend for a moment that the two of you are not, actually, on a ‘fake’ relationship.” Zelda said. “Any tips you want to offer Pipit?”

“Well, man…” Link looked around, trying to put it in words. “It’s tough, you know? You’ll have to share space and that means you’ll have to negotiate everything. And by that, I mean _everything_ , otherwise you’ll want to kill her by the end of the week. Trust me on that. You’ll have to agree where the fruit goes, and where you can keep your socks, and where you are allowed to be messy and where you both should keep tied up. And it takes a while to get in the rhythm, you know? It’s a bit like sex, on that matter: you stumble a bit in the beginning, and if you’re not careful you may end up hurting each other over the silliest things. But after you both click, man, it’s the most crazy feeling of intimacy and closeness and _belonging_ , just getting home and realizing everything is the way both of you always wanted, that you fit together so well… I mean, I just realized, it’s a _lot_ like sex in that matter. And by that I mean, it’s great, really. Totally worth the awkward fumbling. You’re going to love it.”

Three pairs of eyes looked at Link as if they had never seen him. After a long silence, Pipit finally managed:

“Ye-yeah, man. Sure. Thank you, really. No.” Link was shrugging, but Pipit laid a hand on his shoulder. “No, I mean it. Thank you. I think I’ll go for it, your words were really-”

Link didn’t figure out what his words have been really, because Ghirahim appeared right beside them, a dagger in his hand.

“Oh, Skychild, there you are! Good evening, Your Holiness, Groose… _Pipit_.”

Pipit’s hand was off Link fast, as if he had been burned.

“Hey, Ghirahim. What are you up to?”

“Killing.” Ghirahim answered with a dark voice, and why was the psychopath staring at Pipit for? “Lots and lots of bloody, painfully slow killing, as you know I enjoy it so very much.” He turned towards Link, a bright smile on his lips. “I think we’ve finally cleaned that part of Eldin, though, so we can all rejoice, no more Bokoblins where it matters!”

“That’s great!”

“It is, isn’t, love? Now give us a kiss, I must go home. I’m in dying need of a bath and clean clothes.”

Link felt himself pouting, even as he reached for Ghirahim’s cape. “Already? I thought we were going up together.”

“No can’t do, baby. But I’ll wait to have dinner with you, how about that?”

“Perfect!” Link closed his eyes as Ghirahim leaned over him, kissing him deeply, one hand on the nape of the Hero’s neck. It was a deeper kiss than they usually shared in front of others, but Link wasn’t complaining: Ghirahim tasted like metal and something sweet. When they finally parted, the demon looked way too satisfied – and promising. Link blushed and waved his goodbye: “Bye, wifey!”

“Bye, hubby!” with that, Ghirahim disappeared.

“Hum.” Groose inclined himself towards Link. “That fake relationship of yours involves a lot of faking kissing, doesn’t it?”

Link shrugged. “What can I say? We’re method actors, bro.”

*

(That night, Link was marked: bites and scratches and bruises all over his body, every touch of Ghirahim leaving a path on his body. “You don’t get to escape me now, Hero.” The demon whispered against his ear as he fucked him deep by the third time, warm come escaping from Link’s stretched hole, the pleasure making him dizzy. “You’re forever entangled in my red thread.”)

*

“Do you think Gondo will still live with Greba, or should we offer him a home of his own?” Owlan asked, studying the map where they were all marking their future houses.

“We could give them a single house, but offer them a bigger land. That way, if Gondo ever decides to marry and build a new home for his family, he won’t have to live away from his mother.” Gaepora wisely decided.

“I believe Headmaster Gaepora is right. We could place them, let me see…” Link made grabby hands for the map. “How about right here?”

“I thought you were reserving this site for yourself, Link.” Gaepora kindly pointed.

“Well, I am, but see, I just really like the view there… Besides, we could still share. The house will be just me and Ghirahim, I don’t think it’s probable that we get to have kids; we don’t need that much space. Just a small garden for the freak to grow his magic mushrooms and we’ll be good.”

Link raised his eyes from the map, to find Zelda staring intently at him. He gave her a small smile and they kept discussing the future houses.

Later, after the meeting, Zelda took his arm as they walked along the river, talking alone in a way they hadn’t been able to in a long while.

“Link, I need to ask you something.”

“Not another quest, is it?” he said with a chuckle.

“Not in this lifetime, no!” she smiled at him. “I just wanted to ask you if you realize how serious your relationship with Ghirahim is.”

“Zelda, there’s no relationship with…”

“Link. Please.” He immediately shut his own mouth. “I know what you have been saying to us, all that bullshit about emotional-free sex, but think about it: have you considered, even for a second, to live without Ghirahim on the Surface?”

“Live… without him?”

“Yes, Link. You’re running out of excuses here. You started this whole ‘scheme’ because you wanted to get rid of Peatrice – she’s practically married now. He wanted to be respected in our community – he’s fighting alongside our knights, just as Groose or Karane or you. You both wanted to have your own place – we’re coming to the Surface, you guys can live wherever you want to, and yet, you didn’t even blink before you told us all that you plan to live the rest of your days in a cozy little home with Ghirahim.”

Link couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t think. “I-I don’t know what to tell you, Zelda.”

“Link, my friend.” She smiled again, so gentle, so pure, so gorgeous. “My dear, dear friend, my Chosen One, my child: I’m not asking you to tell me anything. I’m not asking you to change. I’m just trying to wake you up, as I did so many times before: you’re the only one who didn’t realize you’re already in a relationship. We all know. We are all happy that you’re… happy. Finally.”

*

(That night, when he got home, he told Ghirahim he couldn’t sleep with him. He was tired, he had a headache, he felt sick – muttered excuses that Ghirahim didn’t confront. He paced the house the whole night, unable to lie down. Later, much later, right before the first signs of morning, Link laid his body beside Ghirahim, pulled him close, woke him up, kissed him deeply. Every thrust inside his once enemy came without a single word, a single sound, as Link buried his nose on the soft hair of Ghirahim’s nape. Slowly, so slowly, he kept himself thrusting, until Ghirahim was begging for release, begging for more, begging for him. Then, just then, Link said his name, over and over, trying to understand with his body what his mind couldn’t catch up.)

*

It fucking hurt.

Well, that’s what you get for having a 10 centimeters long spike stuck in your foot, right? Link knew he shouldn’t have been walking barefoot on a construction site, but had been anxious to come back to work on their home, and he had been careless. 

Well. Fuck.

“Just wait a second, I’ll be right back!” Ghirahim told him, the moment the demon finished pulling the spike out.

“Where are you going, asshole, are you really leaving me here?” Link yelled after him, foot bleeding on their future floor.

Ghirahim reappeared in his line of sight. “Link, love, I can’t take care of you with hammers and bricks, I have to go to the Sky to get you what you need, alright? I’ve seen you with worse wounds than this one, hell, _I_ have inflicted you with worse wounds than this one, I’m sure you are able to survive the five seconds it will take me to teleport to our home and back again.”

Link nodded. He wanted to say a sap thing like ‘This, right here, is our real home.’, but he wasn’t sure how Ghirahim would welcome his words. Lately, he had urges of telling Ghirahim all kinds of sap things. Mostly, he had been successful in suppressing said urges, often with wild sex.

Ghirahim was back.

“Now, open up, this will stop the bleeding in no time.” The demon said, a bottle on his hands.

No. Oh, no.

“No, I can’t, dude, are you crazy?” Link yelled, pulling his foot closer to his body. “I can’t drink that, I’ll be out of food and home if I get another potion!”

“Link, you have to drink this, how else are you going to walk?”

“I don’t care, I can’t drink this, I owe-”

“You don’t owe anything!” Ghirahim lost his composure, gesturing with the bottle.

“What?” Link asked stupidly.

“Drink this fucking thing and I’ll explain. Now.” Link took the offered bottle, afraid Ghirahim might start to cut him in other to convince him to heal. The first sip was enough to take care of the wound, but he drank it all, knowing it would be the only way the demon would be happy. “I paid it. I still have some money with me, a treasure or two… I paid your debts in the Bazaar, with Bertie, Luv, and even that freak Sparrot. What the hell were you doing fucking around in a Fortune Teller?”

“He is surprisingly good at finding relics, actually.” Link muttered, awed by this turn of events. “You paid my debts? Really? All of it?”

“Yes, you cheap whore, I paid for it. I wasn’t going to tell you because it’s not a big deal, I mean, we live together, that’s what people do, right? How’s your foot now, anyway?”

Link blinked at Ghirahim, crouched over him examining his foot with worry in his eyes.

“I love you.”

Ghirahim chuckled. “Yeah, yeah, gold-digger, I’ll buy you something pretty as soon as we’re out of here, okay?”

Link swallowed. “No, I mean. Really. I love you. And I didn’t realize it because you paid for my debts, I just. Fuck. People do that when they live together, right? They take care of each other and worry and take over each other’s problems. I want to do that, I – . I’m not sure what I’m saying. I love you.”

Ghirahim stared at him, both eyebrows high, a sly smile on his face: “You sure you don’t love me for my wealth? If it wasn’t for the money, car, movie stars and jewels and all those things I got, I wonder…” he sing-songed.

“No, Ghirahim, fuck, I – ” Link didn’t get to finish his sentence, because Ghirahim kneeled all the way and kissed him, deeply.

“The sentiment is mutual, Skychild. Now let’s go back up, I want you horizontal for the rest of the day… because of your foot, of course.”

“Of course.”

*

It was a sunny, bright day. The birds were singing, the sky was clear and they had finally, finally, finally fucking finished unpacking all those fucking boxes. Fuck.

Link couldn’t even believe it.

They were both sitting under a tree in their little garden, staring at the open door of their home knowing it was all finished: the place was ready for the rest of their lives. No more boxes, no more building, no more moving furniture. Everything was exactly in its right places. _They_ were in their right places: under a beautiful sun, hands tangled, hearts at peace.

It was… unbelievable, and yet, real.

“Ghirahim?”

“Yes, babe?”

“What part of our relationship is still fake?”

The demon opened a huge smile, getting even closer to Link, whispering just against his ear: “Can you keep a secret, Skychild? I was never much of a liar. Authenticity can be, after all, _much sweeter_.”

They got inside soon after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the last prompt finished, so now I'm left with no aces up my sleeve and a bunch of unfinished prompts, from the sheet and from my good friends in here as well. I'll have to write them, I guess!
> 
> What do you guys think about this? Please let me know! This one was lovely to write. Any word - any word at all - will be a pleasure to hear, seriously.

**Author's Note:**

> We are such a small fandom, I would love to hear from you guys. So, if you read it so far, leave a comment, pretty please?


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